Bakery Lies

Muffins are merely cupcakes that offer the person consuming them some measure of plausible deniability.

I had to reconstitute myself at a subatomic level after an experiment! Arrrrrggggggg!

I would like to spend a moment today paying homage to someone who cracked me up mightily.

Another Doc no less! Evan "Doc" Shaner. He created this hilarious culture bomb you see to the right... visit his blog to get the story and a MUCH larger than thumbnail version. (Being respectful of other artists I am cautious not to step on someone's toes while trying to popularize and praise them)

"What if Charles Schulz created the Watchmen?"

According to his post, it has been brought to his attention that someone else had the same Idea back it the 80's. So I am on a quest to find that art as well... maybe I can also get a thumbnail still of the "Watchmen Babies" comic from the Simpsons. : )

***Update***

Found it!

This was done by Jeff Parker sometime in the 80's

Here is Jeff Parkers take on Watchnuts from his blog...
Great Minds, Thinking Alike

Ahhh, what fun. : )

My Insane Venture Brothers Predictions

Well, It all fell into place last night... I watched the new venture Brothers online and my fun/crazy theories seem to have more weight today than they did before...

If you haven't seen it because you still watch "TV" then there are spoilers ahead.... *****SPOILER ALERT*****

A few weeks back I told a my wife that I though Henchman #21 was secretly a super scientist... Now I am almost sure of it, or at least I am sure I WANT it to be true. Some major events happened in the season finale and I will cover how I think they will effect the show.. Read on...My wacky ideas will be revealed. Who knows by posting this at adult swim a while ago maybe I just contributed major plot points to the next season! Who would ever know? They could just say "Yeah man, you sure called it!" Ah the internet...

Venture Brother Season Finale Ramifications and Fun Time Speculation:

1. The clones were mentioned as being "illegal" I don't think Rusty will be allowed to start up that process again, he is now under scrutiny for such activity. Also keep in mind the time frame needed to develop the slugs... he had a "stash" of Hank and Dean clone slugs, one would assume it took years to grow the slugs to maturity in the clone farm... Why else would he keep so many? They are gone. The boys are mortal.

2. Brock IS actualy quitting, he needs to get away, He is missing something from the relationship with the ventures. When he has been saying stuff like "we arent a family" I think he really feels that way, but its not because of the boys. I do think he cares for them... Its Rusty. He is sick of Rusty's crap and the fact that he saves his ass on a daily basis and gets no respect for doing it. Rusty needs to redeem himself to Brock for him to come back. They need to admit that they are friends and work on a new relationship from there. If Brock comes back he should not be merely a body guard but a partial partner in venture industries. (with a osi mission and license)

I think Rusty will have to realize and admit that he needs and even loves Brock, he will have to admit that he wants him as a permanent member of the family and I also think he will have to prove this to Brock by using his skill (maybe even going beyond what he his normally capable of) and saving Brock from some peril in the same way Brock has always saved him.

3. Yes, I think they killed 24... and for good reason. Drama. We like these guys, hell we LOVE these guys! Because they represent us in a way. But what better way to bring us INTO the story than to give us something to fight for.

******Wild speculation for fun begins here********
For a long time now I have had a pet theory about #21 that I will now share for the first time publicly... I think he is secretly a super scientist! The best part is that he himself is not aware of it. You know how he is always saying "HOW DID I NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS!" I think its because he was the one (working alongside Dr. Girlfriend) who reverse engineered the stolen technology from sergeant hatred and also created many original technologies, but the Monarch erases his memory regarding these projects on a regular basis to keep him under control. Only the Monarch and Dr. Girlfriend knows that he is a savant. The only give him access to the tools and technology that spur his talents as needed. Am I insane? Yes... but I like to think I am a fun kinda crazy. And it would explain a LOT. He is always talking about how he worked on this or that but didn't know about all its features, also his physical condition doesn't seem like it would be tolerated unless he had something else to contribute. Also, his crush on Dr. Girlfriend may play into this... perhaps thats part of the way they get him to do what they want and those two would have had to work closely together... even if he doesn't recall WHY he loves her it could be because he has spent a lot of time with her.

Now with that in mind... I think the death of #24 is the catalyst for a rebirth of #21! I think with nothing to ground him he falls into himself and becomes something darker, maybe something even dangerous. I think he begins a quest to resurrect #24! He KNOWS that Hank and Dean "cant die" and he has seen the army of clone slugs. So maybe he strikes out on his own and attempts to get Rusty to clone #24, perhaps by force. Maybe along the way he realizes that he is every bit as smart as Rusty and can do it himself if he just steals the money/equipment he needs. At some point maybe he even gets visited by Dr. Henry Killinger and a new villain is born. All this would put him in conflict with Rusty, Brock, JJ (he needs to steal stuff from spider skull), and even the Monarch as he realizes how he has been manipulated all these years!

It could even return to the status quo after... because once #24 is alive again, he will be happy and want to be placated. He never wanted to be the hard ass. He was just doing what he had to do to save his friend.

Hows that for wacky!

One person on the Adult Swim boards read my post and remind me that he has been talking about becoming "The Viceroy" for a long time, He seemed to think my theories might fit with this. : ) Fun stuff indeed.

Who wouldn't want to see a trimmed down 21 fighting for the life of his only true friend, seen by the world as a villain but on the most noble of quests, willing to do almost whatever it takes to bring... him... back... and maybe even bringing Brock to his knees if he were unlucky enough to get in his way. Can they stop him? Should they stop him? Will 24 be 24?... or some horrible 24 like, thing!

Hell thats the friggin VB movie right there if you ask me!

When Does Construction On The Lair Begin?

And for that matter, can you even get real estate in a volcano these days? Maybe a dark swamp or a skull shaped island will have to do for now. Its a sellers market for prime "lair" properties I bet.

Regular visiter BENDER BENDING RODRIGUEZ has burst onto the blog-o-sphere for hacking a child's toy into an evil robot minion...

gizmodo.com
www.destructoid.com
blog.makezine.com

Let his career in supper science/costumed aggression Begin! (We won't judge his lifestyle choice. Villain or good guy, we will still support and nurture him as he carves the turkey at thanksgiving time with his superscience lasers.)

Way to go!

Latest Video:

Leslie Lee Appreciation Week 08

Friends, It has finally come again, the time each 486 years that we take one week to fully honor Leslie for no reason other than that she is awesome.

The aztec had a name for Leslie, it was Quaxiquatiataltaxabelgle. Unfortunately the modern attempts at translation have only come up with something close to "have you seen my red feathers? I need them for my ass fan." But I am sure it has lost something over the millennia and once meant something far more grand... I mean they had a frigin NAME for her! They just don't do that for anyone... do they?

Anyway... I have collected some photographic evidence of Leslie's greatness...

Click here to visit Leslie Lee Appreciation Week photo set
Click here to view in Fancy Pants™ Slide show format

I will be adding more as the week goes on (not nessasarily every day mind you) so check back often! Also please leave links to any cool leslie photos you have posted... maybe we can start a group. hehe.

*Update*
New images added today! Behold Renaissance Leslie!

Also we have a new content provider... squeezymoose! Since we have more than one person chiping in... as promised I have started the Leslie Lee Appreciation Week 08 Group where everyone can pool all the Leslie goodness.

Be sure to leave comments on the pictures when you stop by, share stories of Leslie inspired by the pictures! (hint: factuality is optional if you ask me.) Have fun with the festivities everyone! HAPPY LLAW08!

Darth Needs a Makeover

Here are my favorites...








Oh my god... you have to give love to "Darth Fink!"


Be sure to go check out the rest here..

*Update*
BBR pointed out that this photographer doesn't link back to the artists or the project website, so if you would rather have the WHOLE story... Here is the home of the project: The Vader Project They of course list all the artist and have many more pictures!

Sorry for the sloppy reporting in the first place my friends!

Hellboy: The Golden Army... Well, It Sure Was Pretty!

I have to admit that a bit of shine is off my golden boys.

I freak'n LOVE the work of Guillermo del Toro and Mike Mignola and since they are both credited as writing the screenplay for this film I can't let mike off the hook totally here it would seem. But I was a touch let down by Hellboy II... Maybe my expectations were to high.

It was fun, it was visually stunning as you would expect, but the story just cut too many corners (My friend Leslie pointed out the abrupt and poorly explored change of attitude in one character as something that bothered her and thats a perfect example.) and the film overall treated the source material too lightly for my taste. I suspect they gave in to pressure to make a commercially viable film and sacrificed even more of the tone of the oftentimes heartbreaking work of Mike Mignola than even the first film did.

I know all the arguments about making graphic novels and comics into films and how you have to change them to suit the audience... but you know what? Maybe its time we took back film from the "audience" which is actually just a metaphor for "box office" which is in turn a metaphor for greed.

Make smaller films, make them cheaper, have less people go see them and keep them running for longer periods of time, convert more theaters to digital to accommodate quickly adjusting to a smaller film gaining popularity quickly by word of mouth. In short make films that are not such a compromise because you feel you need to sell "X" number of tickets. I would like to see the death of the "blockbuster" and I would certainly like to see great martial like Hellboy avoid the "blockbuster treatment" in the future... and yet still get made into films. Yeah, I know, I am insane. : )

I am pretty sure about this "compromise to be able to make the big film at all" theory I have. I could be wrong, but if I go read Conqueror Worm and then watch Devils backbone again, I somehow don't think I will come away convinced that those 2 guys REALY wanted to cast Seth MacFarlane as the soulful and deeply troubled Johann Kraus. I was so thrown off by his voice that I turned to my friend during the credits and said "I guess I can't be annoyed about the changes to the Klaus character if Mike Mignola was credited on the screen writing." it was shortly after that that my wife pointed out that it WAS Seth MacFarlane, and after that I could'nt seem to call him Kraus... it kept coming out "Klaus" I think because after making the connection, he was then just a goldfish with a somewhat fake german accent that had been turned into ectoplasm just like Johann was and somehow ended up in this movie.

I have read they cast him because he could do the wheezing and mechanical sound (huh, mechanical sound?)... Sorry, I'm not buying that, we perfected that technology in the 70's with James Earl Jones. I think it would have been much more important to find a "good actor" if thats what they were really going for and worry about letting foley artist and sound engineers do their job after getting the performance... they, (or the studio) where hoping for funny I think... and honestly I don't think they got it. Oh well.

Honestly, There was still lots about it to love and I will watch it again. It just won't end up being in my top 100... which is so strange for me because I love the work of these 2 men so much and it seemed like a sure thing.

Japanese Office

This is just to make my wife laugh, she is more a fan of the show than me, but I also enjoy it...

Other people can look at the clip too I guess. : )



By the way, allow me to whip out my crystal ball regarding the office...

Don't read this if you don't want to hear my prediction of how the office series will/should end.

A few nights ago I told Katy that I had come up with the perfect way to do a series finale of the office. I think when it has all run its course, and maybe as a central plot point Jim and Pam have still not gotten engaged because of several missed opportunities and misunderstandings. Pam should have a bit of a breakdown in an interview, just talk about how she thought things were supposed to be "different" (Jim could have also had an emotive interview as well) and the "camera" will start to move like its trying to decide what to do.

Then suddenly, not able to hold his tongue any longer Ricky Gervais steps out from behind the camera revealing himself to have been the director of the documentary the whole time. He consoles her and once he lets slip a bit of confidential information that he thinks will make her feel better... he starts to lose all objectivity and starts spill the beans about lots of things to everyone because he can't stand to see them hurting.

The "director" could then take on a role of the great and powerful OZ, showing them how much they really care for each other by running the tapes that they have never seen. Like explaining to Pam that Jim intended to propose to her on the night of Toby's party and showing her all the lengths that he went through to make it perfect. I can even see a perfect comedic moment were he could be scrubbing the tape back and fourth at the point he is almost certain Jim was about to ask.

We could also start seeing more of the camera crew in a more loose style as a "character itself" bringing quite a bit of comic relief about how they have been doing this over the years and why... it might be funny to hear Ricky Gervais mention off handedly that he used to manage an office before getting into doing these documentaries.

If I am in anyway right... please give me a dollar for being psychic. : )

Clearly Bowie is Evil

I have a friend (who shall remain nameless) who has never seen the venture Brothers, so I collected a few of the clips involving fun music references for him. The show is full of stuff like this and I highly recommend it for anyone who is of a certain age and likes having their pop culture served a bit blacken and on a skewer.

It's clear to me that these guys that created the show are big fans of Johnny Quest, David Bowie, comics and cartoons and everything that gets parodied on the show in general... but like a lot of us, they just can't help being smart asses... I like that.

Enjoy!

The new season begins in June if I am not mistaken.